home about us our blog guestbook disorder info resources archive glossary

For New Systems

Written by Caspian, 4/1/2023 at 9:17 a.m.

Content Warnings: None

First, let me state that you are safe. You aren't crazy, delusional, insane; any other word that you can think of. You may be in the denial stage, trying to say that your system doesn't exist, or that you can't possibly be an alter. Accepting that this is your reality can be very tough and challenging, and I won't force you to accept that just this second. If you need to, you can always come back to this at a later point in time.

I applaud you for taking your first steps into discovering that you are part of a system! This can be very mentally draining and difficult, but you'll learn more about yourself and the system as you progress. One thing I will implore you not to do: please do NOT go digging for trauma. I know it may be tempting to see if you have any "evidence" of the cause for this, but it'll only hurt yourselves in the long run.

Just exist. Take time to learn more about yourself and any other alters that you have contact with. Don't force your alters to talk if they don't want to (or even if they aren't able to, in some cases). Here are some things you can try in order to communicate with the other alters:

You should also try and document as much as you can about the other alters, triggers that you/others potentially have, and whatever else you can find at the given moment. Be patient as you get this information; sometimes alters won't want to present themselves right away, and that's okay. I wouldn't worry about labels or alter roles at this time; that information will come to you with time.

Therapy is a very helpful tool for some people (though therapy doesn't work for everyone). I would reccomend that you visit a trauma-informed therapist as they typically have more information on PTSD and dissociative disorders than a typical therapist would. As a starting point, you can visit Psychology Today to search for therapists in your area. It even includes filters for what type of insurance they accept and types of therapy offered.

Please note: If you and a therapist aren't clicking, disagree on moral or humanitarian values, or especially if your therapist does not respect you or other clients, you have every right to leave and find a different therapist. We, personally, have been through three different therapists before finding one that works for us. If you fear that others would consider this "doctor shopping" - their opinions don't matter. What matters is your well-being and finding a therapist that works for you.